


Ben & Jerry: The Only Two Men Actually Worth a Shit

by Harsley



Category: Shameless US - Fandom
Genre: F/F, svendy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-07
Packaged: 2018-01-23 20:58:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1579358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harsley/pseuds/Harsley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mandy consoles her sister-in-law.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ben & Jerry: The Only Two Men Actually Worth a Shit

Mandy came home from another shit day at work and promptly began taking off all unnecessary clothes; shoes, hat, apron. She had about half of the buttons down on her uniform when she heard sniffling coming from Mickey’s old room. That seemed strange considering Yevgeny was fast asleep in his bassinet by the couch. Mandy walked closer to the sound and saw Svetlana with her face buried in a pillow. She must have sensed movement near the door because she lifted her head.

"What?" Svetlana asked, not bothering to wipe her eyes.

"I just wanted to make sure everything was okay," Mandy told her. "I can tell that it’s not. Hope you’re not crying over my piece of shit brother though. He’s kinda a lost cause with the whole butt fucking thing."

"It’s girlfriend. She being sent back to Russia."

"Girlfriend?"

Svetlana fished out a cigarette and lit it before offering one to Mandy who readily accepted it. They smoked in silence for a moment before Svetlana elaborated.

"I spend all day with dicks in my mouth. Then found I like girl parts there a bit more."

"No shame in that. Dicks cause about 99% of the worlds problems, specifically some men trying to be what they don’t have. Take for instance my dad, my brother, every guy I’ve banged from Lip to Kenyatta…"

"And what happen to chocolate man?"

"Hospital. I accidentally dropped a handful of rat poison in his morning coffee before he left for work. If he comes back, I still have Terry’s old shotgun that I’m saving for a special occasion. In the meantime, how about I grab the Ben & Jerry’s I’ve been hiding underneath the frozen broccoli?"

“Who is Ben and Jerry? I thought we didn’t like the men?”

"It’s fucking ice cream. You have that in Sochi right?"

"Not the Ben Jerry."

"So we’ll put on Buffy in the living room and make a date out of all right? It’ll make you feel better."

Without waiting for an answer, Mandy bounced out of the room. Svetlana might have gone cold on men but she was really warming up to her sister-in-law.


End file.
